Tuesday, 18 June 2013

Just Before Midnight

Ten minutes left in the day.
I'm slowly fading away.
Darkness pulls me under.
My thoughts fill me with wonder.
They keep me awake.
Head spinning until day break.
I never feel rejuvenated.
Life is just too complicated.
I cry and I scream.
Why can't I have a peaceful dream?

Friday, 31 May 2013

A Big Thank You

          When I first started this blog I never knew how much it would help me, which I never intended it to. I set a goal to have written 10 entries by the end of the year, and I've beaten it. As my 12th entry I would really like to thank anyone who has read any of my blog. I do work very hard and take lots of pride in it. I absolutely love writing, more than I love sleep or food. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I often choose writing over socializing. I'm more of a people watcher, not talker. I like to observe the way people react to situations and weird things that people do. I would love some comments or feed back from anyone who has read my work. I'm only 14 years old and I'm trying to figure out if I'm any good at this. Maybe you have ideas for topics I could write about? Shoot me a comment!

           Thank you :)

Awkward Silence

     Do you ever see someone and just walk by without saying a word? Do you and  another person often share awkward glances, but never make conversation or introduce yourselves? Why is it that we just can't break the silence sometimes? We all do it, even the most friendly and outgoing people. So I've decided to challenge myself and beat this weird habit. The next time I find myself in one of those stiff situations, I'm going to reach out and be the first to say hello. All you have to do is flash a smile.

That's Just How We Rolled (2000's) ~ A School Assignment ~

     For those girls who grew up in the 2000's, there were many ridiculous things that we begged and pleaded our parents for. Looking back on our childhoods, the list of popular toys, outfits, hairstyles, TV shows and teen idols drags on, and on, and on. So if you feel like a blast from the past, keep reading! Who knows, you might even be inspired to drag out your boxes of things from under your bed you just couldn't part with.

      Way back when we were toddlers there were so many TV shows out there. Barney, Dora, Bear and the Big Blue House, Max and Ruby, The Berenstain Bears, The Big Comfy Couch, The Wiggles, Zoboomafoo and Veggie Tales. You can't deny it, you've watched at least 2 of those. Those stupidly simple and repetitive kid shows were the building blocks of how we turned out today. I hate to say it, but they influenced us much more than our parents ever did. What Dora says, always goes.

       I honestly think that we had one of the best time frames to be little kids. Everything an adult did, we did too. We had toy shopping carts, kitchens, easy-bake ovens, baby changing tables, babies that you could actually feed like Baby Alive, and we even had doctors sets. We learned how the world worked without even knowing what we were doing. There is no way around it, dress-up happened all the time, especially on play dates. Remember those? The poor giant Barbie heads, we destroyed them. My Little Ponies! I had one in every colour and "breed", if you can even call them that. Our first taste of real technology was the Tamagotchi, and boy did we love those things. And what about Webkinz? Everyone had those things lying around. I still have garbage bags full in our attic! No wonder Toys-R-us stayed in business!

       Now days kids spend all their time inside using electronics. When we were little we got sent outside in the morning and didn't come home until dinner was ready. Forget Facebook and ipods, we loved chalk, skip-its, hoola-hoops, Hop-Scotch, jump rope and even just plain old Tag. On rainy days or when it was cold outside, we hauled out the play food and let our imaginations run free. "No I want to be the mommy, and you'll be the sister!" we've all said those words while 'House' or 'Family'. Those games were mostly played as little kids, but let's be honest and admit that we played them until we were at least ten years old.

    As we got a bit older we started getting wrapped into the popular culture of the world. By age 6 Hannah Montana was the girl that we all wanted to be. She was my biggest idol, and she was probably the biggest female icon for the young girls of our generation. We started listening to those cheesy 'Mini Pop Kids'  CDs and thought we were super stars waiting to be discovered. Little did we know that the neighbours closed their windows when we belted out Britney Spears' "Oops I Did It Again!". Kim Possible, That's So Raven, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody and Wizards of Waverly Place were constantly playing in the living room. One day while watch Family Channel, the very first Jonas Brothers music video came on. They were the boy band of our generation, though not everyone liked them openly. You have to admit, even if you hid it, that you got butterflies when they showed up in our favorite magazines. The three brothers were taken over by the massive sensation Justin Bieber. He has to be the biggest teen heart throb who ever lived, the most famous guy on the planet, and he's not hard on the eyes either. Pop culture is what we compare ourselves to, and strive to be like.

     Let's talk about some of the indescribable fashion choices we and our parents made. Jeez, there were some bad ones, starting with Crocs. Let me just put it out there that if I catch anyone I know wearing Crocs, I will seriously disown you. Don't do it. Skorts and flared jeans were all the rage, or maybe just the cheapest things. We didn't really care what were wore until age ten, so why would our parents? Lace socks, we all had them and wore them over nylon tights when going to church, Christmas dinner or a birthday party. We can't forget stick on earrings! Sometimes you'd find them stuck to the bottom of your favorite slippers, or you'd use them to decorate your diary. They were very multi-functional. Middle parts and jagged bangs. Good god our hairstyles were atrocious! We weren't half as bad as some generations before us, but we weren't innocent either.

     I know I'm not even close to having everything down, but if I did this entry would never end. Comment some of your generation's most poplars. No one will judge because it's just the way we rolled.

Thursday, 30 May 2013

Smiles

       I'm the kind of person who's mood sways with the weather. If it's raining and gloomy, prepare for a quiet day with depressing music. If it's beautiful out with sun and heat, I guarantee that I'll be singing, smiling and skipping around. During the winter I find myself working harder to find joy. In the summer it's hard not to be joyful. I don't understand why we are all engineered to feel certain ways, am I the only one? When someone dies we are engineered to be sad, but why? I get that it's because you are loosing someone, but why not just celebrate their life? Why are we constantly feeling the way people expect us to? We have the power to feel any way we want to, no matter what anyone else thinks. When the power goes out, don't be annoyed. Whip out the candles and spend some time with family, learn something from your elders and take advantage of it. We are so programmed to using electronics and feeling the need to use them, that we are automatically frustrated when they are cut off. I'm not saying that I have a stellar reputation of being a constant optimist or positive person, but I feel that it's important that we shatter the usual frame of mind. People do amazing things everyday, our mental capacity and strength is amazing. So why can't we make the choice to just smile?

Friday, 5 April 2013

Trust

        Babysitting is an interesting thing. The parents count on you to stay in their home, take care of their kids and keep the house from burning down. How can they be sure that you're not going to rob them blind or trash the house? How do they know that their kids are in good hands, where knives are stored, outlets are covered and the stove won't be left on? Are they always positive that your common sense is reliable? Some parents leave the house with an uneasy feeling and call every half hour. Others have a relieved vibe as they walk out the front door. So many things could go wrong, but most times nothing ever does. I'm sitting on the couch while a young boy sits upstairs watching TV. As I sit here all the possibilities cross my mind, I'm trying not to stress. The mom went to the hospital after experiencing back pain. Who knows when she'll be home? The house is small, but has an open feel. The living room walls are painted in a youthful light blue, with teal couches to match. The coffee table is refinished and painted lime green. It's not your typical "family home", but it portrays the personality of the young mom. It's just her and her son, but they seem happy. There is a cat here too, it's a grey Siamese. His name is Rocky, the mom told me he doesn't like people, but he's not so bad.

         I have a little trouble with trust sometimes. I often doubt the people I know I can count on, but I can't put my finger on exactly why I do it. Maybe it's because I've let go of so many things in my life. If I don't give myself the opportunity to be vulnerable, I can't get hurt. I try very hard every day to let new people in, and keep the old ones close. I guess practice makes perfect.

Could I have held on?


Maybe I just miss her?
The girl I used to be; the brave tree climber with callused hands and grassy feet.
I smile, but not the way I used to with teeth and sparkling eyes.
Her energy has been drained from me and kept in a vile.
If only I could shatter the glass and take back what is rightfully mine.
Try as I might it’s no use, society took hold of me and I have no excuse.
The sky seemed so blue back then, and the trees were tall and strong.
I was blind to the hurt and the pain.
I often ask myself, could you have held on, stayed the same for longer, or not have changed at all?
I’m mourning her disappearance, the life I once led.
The girl I once was.
The joyous song in my head.