Someday when I'm finished school and I can do whatever I want, I'm going to do something unforgettably extraordinary. I don't have any idea what it'll be or how I'll do it, but I'll make it happen.

         When I say unforgettable I don't mean that I don't want the world to forget, I mean that I don't want to forget the distinct feeling I get when I finally do it.

          I couldn't care less about the fame I could gain, the recognition. I just crave a fantastic indescribable feeling.

           When I finally get the feeling, I want to know that if I were to die in that instant, that I would be perfectly content. I want to die feeling lifted and energized, not in a hospital bed. So if one day I get this feeling, I might just let go, or at least try to. I don't know if a person can actually use their psychological power to die, all I know is that I want to die with adrenaline pumping through my veins. I want the sensation of invisibility, like I'm the only person on earth.

           I won't know when it's coming, and I don't know what I'll have to do to make it happen, but when its that unmistakeable moment I'll know.

            Maybe this is just crap though. It might just be an idea that only exists in movies, or in stupid infomercials for anti-depressants. But I'd rather sound like a lunatic than not believe in something bigger than myself, something that walks the border between reality and insanity.

            When I do this extraordinary thing, and get the unforgettable feeling, whatever it may be, it might be the last thing I do and feel. But what more is there to ask for than to die extraordinarily?